“Do you remember that book, Are You My Mother? The way I feel, like especially with the coaches I’ve been interviewing, my number one question—some I’ve asked directly—others I’ve not—the number one question… I feel like I’m that little bird going around, but rather than asking ‘are you my mother?’ I am asking ‘Do you see me?’”
Melissa’s break*through: Super Soul Sunday Gets a Serious Upgrade
In this unique crossover episode of break*through and THE IDEALISTS, we lean into raw and intimate when our host, Melissa Kiguwa, puts herself in the hot seat. On today’s episode, you will go behind the scenes to hear Melissa’s breakthrough… but, not in the way you think. As Executive Producer, it is Melissa’s responsibility to ensure our coaches and guests have all they need before they meet. Producing the show means curating a space of intense vulnerability, which has a lot of ethical considerations. In the case of this week’s episode, something broke down during the process. After the episode, Melissa sat down and debriefed with our guest, opening up a whole new level of insight, exploration, and accountability. This conversation ultimately turned out to be the show.
For the purposes of maintaining confidentiality, names and some identifiable characteristics have been removed. To provide a bit of context, our guest is a new Managing Director of a venture capital fund and is seeking coaching as she establishes herself as a leader in her industry.
in the episode:
We begin our debrief by digging into the guest’s immediate emotional reaction to the session as she deals with her immense disappointment and overwhelming feeling of “this always happens to me.” That people don’t show up and deliver for her—even when they’ve agreed beforehand.
Next, we move on to how there is no breakthrough without safety, and we talk through what specific measures can be taken to address power dynamics so that the guest feels comfortable being fully vulnerable.
Building on this, we deep dive into the guest’s yearning to feel seen by her peers and to experience authentic accountability, connection, and grace when things go awry—as she’s often felt repeatedly let down by other women in her community and the VC community at large—given its competitive tenor.
Lastly, we discuss the ancestral imperative she feels around her work—and how she needs a coach who gets that she is doing something that’s never been done by the women in her lineage and that it’s work that is urgent, necessary, and a priority. This is not just another VC job—this is her calling and her mission.